The truth about Santa Claus

After reading the following article in the Claremont Courier, I couldn't resist sharing this.

The truth about Santa Claus

Dear Editor:

The recent controversy over Thanksgiving has been very thought provoking and we have another issue coming up. The annual Christmas tree lighting ceremony will take place soon, featuring Santa and Mrs. Claus. Before the ceremony however I think we need to ask some hard questions about Santa.

Perhaps the School Board and the Superintendent would like to take up these questions?

1. He has all of these elves working for him, but does he pay them a living wage? Do they receive health benefits? A retirement package?

2. From what I have seen there is not a great deal of diversity in the elf workforce, should Santa be questioned as to his hiring practices?

3. What about working conditions for the elves, the North Pole can get extremely cold, is there adequate heating and ventilation?

4. Animal rights: being strapped to a sled and forced to fly around the world for 24 straight hours seems rather brutal to me, how are the reindeer treated?

5. Funding: who is underwriting Santa's whole operation? He charges nothing for the toys?

Could it be a vast conspiracy of corporations trying to hook our children on toys so they can profit from it the rest of the year? Are Dick Cheney and Halliburton involved?

I don't want my concern over these issues to deprive the children of their fun, so I will still bring my children to the tree lighting, but until I have the answers to these questions, I will refrain from wearing any Santa hats.

FYI: The controversy mentioned above was due to the celebration of Thanksgiving as a national holiday which evoked raw emotions among Native Americans living in the United States. Many Native Americans take offense to the national holiday, perceiving Thanksgiving as a day of mourning.